Where did Heath and Cori go?

This is a rhetorical question. Don't think too much about it.

However, I do think a lot about it. Heath and I both do. We've reached a point in parenting where we are constantly being thought of as mom and dad; we are always a family. But, where did Heath and Cori go? Where did the couple go? When did 'relationship' become 'co-parenting'?

When we first had Lucy, it brought us so close - closer than we could have ever imagined. It was such a wonderful feeling to share the miracle of birth with Heath - to look at him and know that we created this beautiful baby out of love. Wonderful!

Since Lucy turned one year old and became a mobile, tantrum-thrower, who can't be left alone for two seconds...our relationship has shifted. It is all we can do to have an adult conversation in bed at night before falling quickly asleep.

Lucy goes to sleep at 8:30 pm, you say?

You are right. However, that time is when I can actually use a pen without someone crying and having a fit, trying to snatch it out of my hands. Or, when I can cut coupons without someone thinking they need to shred my papers or steal my scissors. Or, use cleaning products without having someone right behind me, digging in my cleaning bucket or trying to wipe her face with the Pledge towel I just used.

Alright, alright. I know. I can do these things, if I can distract her. However, let me give you a quick example of such a case. I wasn't watching her for a few minutes and left her in the living room. It should have been pretty safe - no exits, no electrical outlets, no heavy items, no swallow-able items. However, Heath found her.....sitting in the middle of the coffee table, watching television. She had moved a couch pillow over to the side of the table and climbed right up.

I wouldn't change a thing in our lives. I love my family so much. However, Heath and I need to find one another again. We need a re-boost of relationship energy.

We often feel guilty for having date nights. We feel super guilty when Lucy stays the night somewhere. And, when you feel rested and good the next day, you almost feel guilty for enjoying yourself so much. It's like you shouldn't be happy, if Lucy wasn't involved...

We recently went to Weston, Kansas and stayed at a Bed and Breakfast with my family. Lucy stayed at her Grandma Jeannie's. It was so relaxing. Heath and I had a great time. We found each other again.

Monday came and we went back to the old routine.

We know that we need to be more active in making date nights a routine. We need to. It's tough; I'll admit. Since we work so much, we don't get to spend as much time with Lucy as we want. Any time we get with her, we cherish. We hate to give up even a couple of hours to go out to eat.

So, perhaps we need to take one night a week to not do chores, not mow, not cut coupons, not work, not do all of the things we just 'have' to do. We could take one night to put Lucy to sleep, pop some popcorn, and just watch a movie, cuddling on the couch.

It's easy to feel guilty about not cleaning or making lists of to-dos. The weeds in my flower bed mock me. The unswept floor really grinds my gears. But, when it comes to our relationships, it's easy to put them on the back burner to these minuscule, unimportant to the big picture, things.

This weekend we are going away for our three year wedding anniversary. Hopefully we can start a trend of date night.

Have you and your significant other ever reached this bump in the road? How did you get over it?

Note: Heath and I are doing just fine. Family - don't freak out like we'll get a divorce or something. haha.