"My Search for the Perfect Fry"

You know in that one episode of Sex and the City, when Carrie isn't in a relationship and has nothing to write about? She ends up writing about her search for the perfect french fry...

I feel like that is what this post is about, kind of.

I really wanted to go on an unpleasant rant about mothers bringing their children to DayCare sick (with fevers). But, I don't want to offend anyone or single anyone out....although I may have already done so. In addition, Heath said that my recent posts have been too "emotional". I think he is embarrassed by me...

So, I will stick to non-controversial topics and mild, non-dramatic stuff, like french fries.

Now, I understand that french fries could very well be controversial, especially McDonald's french fries. Yum, by the way. A lot of people out there are very against their children eating fast-food...again, especially McDonald's. But, I'm not going to get into all that. We have McDonald's on average, maybe once every two or three months and I don't see a problem with that. Anyway...again, we aren't getting into that.

We stopped by McDonald's one day in a rush. We had somewhere to be, so we went through the drive-thru and got Lucy a Happy Meal. Usually they ask if we want fries or a apple slices; this time, they didn't. I didn't think much of it, until we got the order. She had both! What a nice surprise! The package of apples was smaller and so were the fries. In fact, the fries were so teeny-tiny!

They were so cute! I loved the miniature cardboard holder they were in. I think that maybe 10 or 15 fries could fit inside.

Here they are, next to Heath's iPhone. So cute....is that weird to think fries are cute?

When we handed them to Lucy she said, "Baby fries!" Ha ha. Even she recognized how small they were.

A plus, McDonald's, A+. Perfect portion sizes while pleasing little tummies with fries AND fruit.

Weird, pointless post. But, it happens...

Advice on Parenting

When is it acceptable? And, when is it offensive?

I've had advice range from -

"Put two sets of crib sheets and liners on the mattress; so, in the middle of a messy night you can just take off the top two layers and go right back to sleep."

to

"You need to get out of your bubble and experience more things, to be a better mom."

Helpful information to downright infuriating comments.

Yes - someone actually told me that I needed to get "out of my bubble" to be a better mom. The bubble I live in? I'm careful and I think about consequences before doing something. How awful of me, right? Anyway, enough of that irritation...let's just say that Heath said my face became visibly red during that particular conversation.

Anyone with a brain knows that you should never utter to another mother, "To be a better mom, you should..." However, I've also been given advice that I didn't agree with and I felt like I was being told that my way was somehow "wrong." This is also difficult to deal with.

Don't get me wrong. I love giving my opinion and advice. I am the first one to do it...through blog even. :) If you are going to see a movie and I've already seen it? Be prepared; I'm going to tell you what I think about it. Having a problem? I can help! Or, at least I think I can. And, if I know some amazing fun fact or work-around, I'm going to share it with the world.

So, I've had to tread carefully. I don't want to offend or irritate any other mothers out there. I don't want them to say, "Gosh, Cori always has something to say!" Or, "She thinks she is such an expert." 

Believe me - I know I'm not an expert. I just worry sometimes that my mouth gets ahead of my mind. So, I've come up with some rules for myself, about parenting advice:

1) If the mother seems uncomfortable with the conversation (or her face turns red), abandon your point and shush!

2) If the mother continues to stand up for what she does, she disagrees with you; abandon your point and shush!

3) If someone says they read it in a book, you, not the author of said book, are probably not going to change their mind.

4) Ask yourself, "Is this information helpful or are you just spouting off knowledge?" Sometimes I think I'm John Tesh and that I need to make everyone aware of what I have read or heard.....Sorry! I am most guilty of this!

5) Ask yourself, "Did this person ask for advice or does this seem like a good time to give advice?" If there wasn't a question before hand and there isn't a lingering pause of eye contact, they probably don't care for your in-depth advice. However, if it is a helpful tip, bring it on!

6) Ask yourself, "Is this lifestyle advice?" Because lets face it, you wouldn't talk religion to an atheist. Or, in baby terms, you aren't going to convince a cloth diapering momma that she should go with disposable.

7) If a mother does something and she feels the need to explain her actions to you, don't challenge it. She isn't asking for advice or approval. She is probably trying to nip your advice in the bud.

8) If the mother has more than one child, don't give her advice. She has probably been through it once already! Again, this applies unless it's a helpful tip that you read about on....say....Pinterest. :)

Wait a minute. Am I giving advice on giving advice? Oh, the irony.

I just find it very interesting. Advice is probably one of the most hot-button issues with new mothers. I've read about it, heard about it, and experienced it as well. All mothers want to feel like they are doing their absolute best for their little one. It is tough to hear others give advice; it sometimes seems like criticism. And, I'm not too sure that "constructive criticism" is allowed in parenting...

Now, what did we all learn today?

You make your mistakes and I'll make mine.

Okay, okay, enough of the lecture. I'm not even sure where it came from. It all started from me wondering where the line is. When is it okay and when is it offensive? We shall never know.

Maybe we should just all have our babies wear this:

Until next time...Happy Wednesday!

Big Girl Room

Another renovation is coming soon to the Lucy Jean house! :) We are in the process of changing our spare bedroom into Lucy's big girl room! I have been slowly collecting things for months now, getting way too excited about organizing and decorating - not to mention all of the ideas I've pinned on Pinterest.com.

Although I don't have any before pictures right now, I will have some soon. I do have some of my completely accurate and to-scale diagrams though! :)

Pretty bland room, right? Well, this is what I hope to do with it:

 

The closet is pretty big and the tall dresser offers five 1.5' x 2' drawers. As of now, that is plenty of room for Lucy's clothes. The book case will be a storage area for additional toys and other girly items. :) And, I am not sure sure about the rug yet, hence the question mark. The room is carpeted; but the carpet is beige and we might need a pop of color!

Speaking of colors, what is the color scheme? Here it is:

These aren't the exact shades; but, they are as close as I can pull up on the computer right now. :{ The main thing I wanted was for them to be darker and not pastel.

The plan is to have two walls white, one wall teal, and one wall dark purple. The pink and green will be accent colors. :) You would be amazed at how popular these colors really are. I am finding stuff all over!

I plan on buying the same bookcase again, that we have in the playroom, from Target.

I will then fill it with a few, cute bins.

Since I am really getting excited, we have already started to purchase things too. Here are just a few of them: 

I got these cute hooks at Kohl's for only $11 each. They will be prefect for Lucy's coats!

 And, we got this lamp at Target for $16. Lucy picked out the pink one. I let her choose between pink, purple and turquoise. I have a girly-girl after all! :)

I've also had my eye on some bedding at Target.com. I originally wanted to get Lucy Tangled bedding; but, it just didn't tie into the colors. I was afraid that it wouldn't look cohesive enough. So, I am thinking about getting this toddler bedding, even though it has some pastel pink on it...

There are still a few other things we need. So, if anyone spots some cute items out there let me know!

• a ceiling fan (white)
• 7 new drawer pulls/handles (one screw hole)
• accent pillows
• an area rug
• picture frames and other decor
• white shelves (for keepsakes - up and out of the way)
• and more that I can't remember right now...

What do you think so far?

"Rough"

Sorry I haven't been around lately. I've been really busy again and really stressed out. Going to work after the holidays sucks - plain and simple.

Anyway, we have been getting back into the routine of things. Yesterday, I picked Lucy up from DayCare to experience another DayCare milestone. Wanna hear about it? It doesn't matter; because, I'm going to tell you anyway. It was far too frustrating.

I walk in to see Lucy dressed up in a cute little outfit. The provider and I start to talk about the outfit as I pull out my phone and snap a picture.

With a poofy hat on, I didn't notice anything different with Lucy. So, I peeled the clothing and headed to grab her coat. While getting Lucy ready to leave, the provider says, "Lucy has another little bruise on her forehead."

I brushed Lucy's bangs out of the way and see that she has a bruise right above her eyebrow; it still looked kind of red and a little swollen. My first thought is: "typical Lucy." She is constantly bumping her head on things. It happens at home all the time.

I waited to hear how she fell or ran into the doorway. Nope. The, the provider started to say something else. This time, she was choosing her word wisely. I could tell by all the stammering.

"She...well, they were...um, they...well,...they were being a little rough with her today."

My first thought was, "Who is they?"

My raised eyebrow of complete un-impressiveness must have made her continue on with her detail-lacking story.

"A lot of kids were in time-out today."

Okay...

While I finished buttoning up Lucy's coat and put her stocking cap on her, my mind was in a whirl. I could feel my face get hot with anger as I scanned the children in the room. Him...yep. I bet it was him. Or, maybe him.

At that moment two older children started to argue over some toys. One was maybe 6 or 7, definitely elementary school aged, and the other was 5. The five year old had walked up and snatched away the older child's toys. The older kid took them back. The five year old started whining. 

"Uhhhh......huh...huh...huh.....oooooo..."

I mean whiny-whining. Like, I wanted to put Lucy down, go over to him, grab him by the shoulders, tell him that he was 5 years old and to act like it...

I needed to exit and quickly.  

That probably sounds really awful to some of you children lovers out there. Sorry. I think I've addressed my total annoyance with misbehaved children.

I grabbed Lucy's bag, snarled at the children, held back something snarky to say, and muttered a "Bye."

As I walked across the parking lot I thought more and more about it. It really bugged me. I imagined poor little Lucy getting picked on. I looked at her and told her that I was sorry. I wished I could have been there for her. Violence is not the answer; but, at that moment, I hoped that she got a hit in too. I hoped that she did something really awful to them, like broke their toy or spit on them at lunch...something to at least make up for the hitting.

I wanted to ask DayCare who did it. Which kid? But, that would only end up with me strongly disliking the child....for, possibly, ever.

Now, I realize that those thoughts are irrational and unforgiving, especially for children. So, I apologize.

I just don't want Lucy to ever be picked on. I want to always be there for her, especially when she is too young to stick up for herself.

I immediately called Heath and vented. Why was she with those bigger children anyway? There wasn't a fight leading up to said bruise? Should we ask exactly what happened?

To be honest, maybe I shouldn't know. Again, maybe ignorance really is bliss. :[

Slow Dance

It was a Friday night and the whole family, all three of us, were in the kitchen. I don't remember if I was cooking or cleaning, or just being idle. I was standing in the doorway, leaning up against the side, dishtowel in hand, watching Heath and Lucy run around.

I had changed the radio station to one of my favorite "oldies" station. Fleetwood Mac's "Dreams" came on - one of my favorites. I immediately began to sing the lyrics, or what I knew at least, aloud.

Heath picked Lucy up, setting her bottom on his forearm. With his free hand, he grabbed Lucy's hand. They began to dance. Heath swayed back and forth mouthing a word here and there. Lucy looked into her daddy's eyes and giggled in between smiles.

I loved that moment. Although I was just a somewhat emotionally involved bystander, I know how special it was. I thought to myself. In 20 years or so, I will probably be watching this again. But, instead of in our kitchen, they will be having their father/daughter dance at Lucy's wedding.

I closed my eyes tight and tried to file that moment into my memory bank. I wonder if I will think of it years from now...and if it will warm my heart just the same.

"Don't cry over the past; it's gone. Don't stress about the future; it hasn't arrived. Live in the present and make it beautiful."