Where did Heath and Cori go?

This is a rhetorical question. Don't think too much about it.

However, I do think a lot about it. Heath and I both do. We've reached a point in parenting where we are constantly being thought of as mom and dad; we are always a family. But, where did Heath and Cori go? Where did the couple go? When did 'relationship' become 'co-parenting'?

When we first had Lucy, it brought us so close - closer than we could have ever imagined. It was such a wonderful feeling to share the miracle of birth with Heath - to look at him and know that we created this beautiful baby out of love. Wonderful!

Since Lucy turned one year old and became a mobile, tantrum-thrower, who can't be left alone for two seconds...our relationship has shifted. It is all we can do to have an adult conversation in bed at night before falling quickly asleep.

Lucy goes to sleep at 8:30 pm, you say?

You are right. However, that time is when I can actually use a pen without someone crying and having a fit, trying to snatch it out of my hands. Or, when I can cut coupons without someone thinking they need to shred my papers or steal my scissors. Or, use cleaning products without having someone right behind me, digging in my cleaning bucket or trying to wipe her face with the Pledge towel I just used.

Alright, alright. I know. I can do these things, if I can distract her. However, let me give you a quick example of such a case. I wasn't watching her for a few minutes and left her in the living room. It should have been pretty safe - no exits, no electrical outlets, no heavy items, no swallow-able items. However, Heath found her.....sitting in the middle of the coffee table, watching television. She had moved a couch pillow over to the side of the table and climbed right up.

I wouldn't change a thing in our lives. I love my family so much. However, Heath and I need to find one another again. We need a re-boost of relationship energy.

We often feel guilty for having date nights. We feel super guilty when Lucy stays the night somewhere. And, when you feel rested and good the next day, you almost feel guilty for enjoying yourself so much. It's like you shouldn't be happy, if Lucy wasn't involved...

We recently went to Weston, Kansas and stayed at a Bed and Breakfast with my family. Lucy stayed at her Grandma Jeannie's. It was so relaxing. Heath and I had a great time. We found each other again.

Monday came and we went back to the old routine.

We know that we need to be more active in making date nights a routine. We need to. It's tough; I'll admit. Since we work so much, we don't get to spend as much time with Lucy as we want. Any time we get with her, we cherish. We hate to give up even a couple of hours to go out to eat.

So, perhaps we need to take one night a week to not do chores, not mow, not cut coupons, not work, not do all of the things we just 'have' to do. We could take one night to put Lucy to sleep, pop some popcorn, and just watch a movie, cuddling on the couch.

It's easy to feel guilty about not cleaning or making lists of to-dos. The weeds in my flower bed mock me. The unswept floor really grinds my gears. But, when it comes to our relationships, it's easy to put them on the back burner to these minuscule, unimportant to the big picture, things.

This weekend we are going away for our three year wedding anniversary. Hopefully we can start a trend of date night.

Have you and your significant other ever reached this bump in the road? How did you get over it?

Note: Heath and I are doing just fine. Family - don't freak out like we'll get a divorce or something. haha.

My Valentine

 

Happy Valentines Day to all of you lovers out there! :)  I like V-Day, if you will.  I always enjoyed making my Valentines Box, getting cute notes and candy, and picking out the perfect Lisa Frank valentine for my elementary crush, Jed.

I would read my valentines at school and then read through them again, a couple of times, at home. I took the words so literally. "Yay! Bridget thinks I'm Bee-utiful!" :)

Today, it is wonderful to still be able to take Valentines' words so literally.

Heath makes the sweetest notes.  He always calls me his Sweetheart. And, he never fails to tell me that I mean the world to him. I can't do anything, but thank him. I try to thank him everyday, for picking me to spend the rest of his life with.

So, for Valentines Day, I thought I would share a bit more about me and my forever Valentine, Heath.

• We have been together for 1 decade, this year. Wow! 10 years! It doesn't seem like that long at all.
• We started dating in high school at just 15 and 17 years old.
• Our first date was spent cruising around town. haha.
• He was my softball coach when we first started dating. In fact, I felt like he was always a little tougher on me because of it.  Talk about pressure!
• The night before he asked me to be his girlfriend, I was ready to bail; I thought he was just yanking me around.
• The first time I told Heath I loved him, we were arguing and I yelled it at him. haha.
• We were moving into a house together when he asked me to marry him.
• When he asked, he was wearing a suit and I was wearing gym shorts, a t-shirt, and was in need of a shower!
• We claim that he 'adopted' my chihuahuas.  Their names are hyphenated, with both of our last names.
• I let Heath pick out our wedding date, It's okay; he let me pick out the honeymoon.......and everything else practically! :)
• We are that corny couple who dances to slow music, on the weekend, in our living room.
• We are also those parents who have random dance breaks to Usher while cooking supper and feeding Lucy.

I thought I would leave you with some pictures of Heath and me. First, as kids - yes, we were just kids then!  I was 16 and he was 18.  Aww.......the prom. :)  And, then, 6 years later, at our wedding.

Again, Happy Valentines Day to everyone, and especially to my Hunny! :) I hope it is wonderful for you all.

 

High  School Prom

 

Our Wedding Day

Answers

I don't follow a whole lot of blogs. I like to follow people, I admit they are mostly women, who I find intriguing. And, I continue to search for other blogs that are similar to mine - following the path of crazy motherhood and family. Nonetheless, I often come across blog challenges, questions, conversation, and subjects to prompt posts. I feel sometimes that using them takes away from why I started blogging in the first place; but, then again, sometimes I just can't help it!

So, here it is: a post prompted by another blog's questions.

1. What would you pick to eat if you only had one meal left?

Heath and I were just talking about this yesterday! I think it would be chicken alfredo and garlic cheese bread, and creme brulee for dessert. :) Yum! Coming in at a very close second place is Kraft Macaroni and Cheese. I'm easy to please. I could seriously eat KM&C (that's an acronym I just made up.....take it....share it...) for every meal if it wouldn't end with me weighing 8oo lbs! Gotta love those carbs!

2. What quality is the most important to you in the opposite sex?

I always say a sense of humor; but, now that Heath and I have been together for so long, I recognize that 'communication' has kept us together. Yes, I 100% appreciate the goofy dancing and stupid phrases. We have a blast together and are very compatible. He isn't too bad on the eyes either. ;) However, that, alone, can't keep a relationship solid. It is the fact that Heath and I never go to sleep angry, never let an argument just 'disappear', and share our feelings that has equaled 10 years of fabulousness. :)

I hope that we can display a healthy relationship to Lucy. Communication is so important in all facets of life. Now, if everyone else could share their feelings openly and rationally, we could all get along just fine! :) Can you read the psychology major in me coming out?

3. If you could pick your birthday, when would you want it and why?

I don't think I have a specific day that I would want to change my birthday to. Now that I am older, my birthday has become very "unimportant." I may change the day, just because it is so close to Valentine's Day. When I was younger the elementary school Valentine's celebration and my birthday always got mixed. Now, Heath and my Valentine's dinner always gets doubled up with my birthday. Oh well, it isn't too big of a deal to me though.

4. What is your dream job?

Ha. Does anyone ever really know the answer to this question? There have been jobs that I thought I would love and when it came down to it, I didn't. So, who's to say? Unrealistically, I would love to be an actress or something else that would make me millions for working a minimal amount of time. Plus, professional hair and makeup sounds amazing! :) More realistically, or so I think, I would really love to teach in higher education. We'll see...I just want to be happy with what I do.

5. Biggest Pet Peeve?

Sometimes I ask myself how I became so anal. I have a slew of pet-peeves. They make me sound so up-tight. So, here they are: when people say "a hunerd" instead of "a hundred", when people use double negatives in a sentence (ex: "I didn't hurt nobody." "I never done nothing before."), when people cuss at their children, when people's jeans get caught on the tongue of their tennis shoes (some people do it on purpose - ugh!), when some one's eyebrow hairs are messed up, when people walk through my yard, and when I, myself, use improper grammar when speaking. I also hate when people drag their teeth on a fork; but, I think that is more of something that gives me the 'heebie-jeebies' more than anything else.

6. What show can you not miss?

My life sadly involves a lot of television. I am a sucker for a good movie and have grown to love the DVR more than most of my household items. This fall we've been watching: Biggest Loser, Teen Mom, 16 & Pregnant, Melissa and Joey, Hellcats, 2 1/2 Men, The Buried Life, Glee, Storm Chasers, and Keeping Up With the Kardashians. Soon, we will be watching: American Idol, Kendra, Pretty Little Liars, Greek, Huge, Secret Life of the American Teenager, Tosh.0, and 10 Things I Hate About You. And, okay, okay, I'll admit it I also watch Hannah Montana, Sonny with a Chance, and Jonas, L.A. Some would say that was a pretty awful group of shows; to them I say..........well, I've got nothing.......just watch it before you knock it! :)

Occasionally my husband makes me watch Blue Mountain State (is that what it's called?), South Park, The Office, Mythbusters, Jersey Shore, and that R.J. Berger show on MTV.

Well, that is all for now. I hope this gives you a little more insight to my life and more specifically, my mind. Every time I say, or type rather, something ridiculous I can't help but to think, "Oh, Lucy, you have some pretty silly parents! I hope you aren't too embarrassed by us when you're older!"